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sysper

fantasy vs experiance

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sysper
Posted

the question has come up, is the fantasy meant to be realized or, is it meant to stay a fantasy? i've never been with a guy but it's been on my mind for years. it's been a big part of my fantasies for that time. i guess u can look at it as, how far do i wanna go? is just fantasizing about it enough or do i really think about the idea so highly, the next natural step is to go for it? which i guess is a fair question.

but, here's another question, what happens after i go for it? i've had these fantasies for so long they feel like a part of me. kinda give me comfort. once i realize them & experiance them for real the fantasies no longer exist, it's something i would loose. which is fine i guess if i find out from experiance i like being with guys, & i have enough opportunities to be with guys. but what happens if i don't like the experiance? if i hate it? if i loath it? if i feel repused? then the fantasy can never be used by me ever again & i'm left with nothing. yes there would be relief after years of torturing myself with curiosity. years when i was younger, more resiliant & more virile. but i would be emptier because the fantasies would be overshadowed by the grim realization it's not something i'd like.

i'm not talking about having a bad experiance like sleeping with a jerk or running out of lube. i could easily enough chalk it up to experiance but still know i could have a better experiance under better circumstances--a more suitable guy(s), a more private area, a better nite's sleep. i'm also not really talking about feeling guilty afterwards either. though that's another question, i guess if i kept doing it i would get over any guilt.

i'm talking about just not liking it. the fantasy looses it's power. do i then withdraw more from society? do i spiral out of control desparately & haphazzardly looking for meaning in my life? does my confusion grow so i miss opportunites to learn & be happy, or are things clearer to me than they have been for years? if so what do i see? what do i cling to? what do i aspire to? am i now able to be successful with seeking the right member of the opposite sex & establishing a healthy, joyfull relationship with her, or am i plunged even deeper in the hole of incompetence that drains most of the joy out of my life?

Freerid4unme6969
Posted
On 1/2/2019 at 6:33 PM, sysper said:

the question has come up, is the fantasy meant to be realized or, is it meant to stay a fantasy? i've never been with a guy but it's been on my mind for years. it's been a big part of my fantasies for that time. i guess u can look at it as, how far do i wanna go? is just fantasizing about it enough or do i really think about the idea so highly, the next natural step is to go for it? which i guess is a fair question.

but, here's another question, what happens after i go for it? i've had these fantasies for so long they feel like a part of me. kinda give me comfort. once i realize them & experiance them for real the fantasies no longer exist, it's something i would loose. which is fine i guess if i find out from experiance i like being with guys, & i have enough opportunities to be with guys. but what happens if i don't like the experiance? if i hate it? if i loath it? if i feel repused? then the fantasy can never be used by me ever again & i'm left with nothing. yes there would be relief after years of torturing myself with curiosity. years when i was younger, more resiliant & more virile. but i would be emptier because the fantasies would be overshadowed by the grim realization it's not something i'd like.

i'm not talking about having a bad experiance like sleeping with a jerk or running out of lube. i could easily enough chalk it up to experiance but still know i could have a better experiance under better circumstances--a more suitable guy(s), a more private area, a better nite's sleep. i'm also not really talking about feeling guilty afterwards either. though that's another question, i guess if i kept doing it i would get over any guilt.

i'm talking about just not liking it. the fantasy looses it's power. do i then withdraw more from society? do i spiral out of control desparately & haphazzardly looking for meaning in my life? does my confusion grow so i miss opportunites to learn & be happy, or are things clearer to me than they have been for years? if so what do i see? what do i cling to? what do i aspire to? am i now able to be successful with seeking the right member of the opposite sex & establishing a healthy, joyfull relationship with her, or am i plunged even deeper in the hole of incompetence that drains most of the joy out of my life?

It's all an experience so go for it and enjoy what you find out about yourself enjoysex with whomever is in front of you and behind you

Freerid4unme6969
Posted

I enjoy eating pussy and sucking cocks eating cream pie eating ass getting blowjob's and getting my ass played with toys are fun addition to a good time

sysper
Posted

thanks for the encouragement. i'm not denying it's not a bad idea to explore. but the fantasy is what keeps me going sometimes. if i loose that can i guarantee experiance will take it's place?


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